Sunday, December 14, 2025

The 12 Days of Christmas (Standings Edition)

Here is the CCHL's 12 Days of Christmas - standings edition. The first will feature the top 12 teams and the next will feature the bottom 12 teams.

Enjoy!

On the 1st day of Christmas, the standings gave to me…

🎁 One Falcon winning spree!
(Fort Erie still winning, please send help)

On the 2nd day of Christmas, the standings gave to me…

🎁🎁 Two Spurs still chasing,
🎁 One Falcon winning spree!

On the 3rd day of Christmas, the standings gave to me…

🎁🎁🎁 Three Loons a-sneaking,
🎁🎁 Two Spurs still chasing,
🎁 One Falcon winning spree!

On the 4th day of Christmas, the standings gave to me…

🎁🎁🎁🎁 Four Aces dealing,
🎁🎁🎁 Three Loons a-sneaking,
🎁🎁 Two Spurs still chasing,
🎁 One Falcon winning spree!

On the 5th day of Christmas, the standings gave to me…

🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 FIVE CHINOOK STREEEEAKS!
🎁🎁🎁🎁 Four Aces dealing,
🎁🎁🎁 Three Loons a-sneaking,
🎁🎁 Two Spurs still chasing,
🎁 One Falcon winning spree!

On the 6th day of Christmas, the standings gave to me…

🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Six Icecats home wins,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 FIVE CHINOOK STREEEEAKS!
🎁🎁🎁🎁 Four Aces dealing,
🎁🎁🎁 Three Loons a-sneaking,
🎁🎁 Two Spurs still chasing,
🎁 One Falcon winning spree!

On the 7th day of Christmas, the standings gave to me…

🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Seven Kilts flapping,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Six Icecats home wins,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 FIVE CHINOOK STREEEEAKS!
🎁🎁🎁🎁 Four Aces dealing,
🎁🎁🎁 Three Loons a-sneaking,
🎁🎁 Two Spurs still chasing,
🎁 One Falcon winning spree!

On the 8th day of Christmas, the standings gave to me…

🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Eight Comets crashing,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Seven Kilts flapping,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Six Icecats home wins,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 FIVE CHINOOK STREEEEAKS!
🎁🎁🎁🎁 Four Aces dealing,
🎁🎁🎁 Three Loons a-sneaking,
🎁🎁 Two Spurs still chasing,
🎁 One Falcon winning spree!

On the 9th day of Christmas, the standings gave to me…

🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Nine Scorpions stinging,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Eight Comets crashing,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Seven Kilts flapping,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Six Icecats home wins,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 FIVE CHINOOK STREEEEAKS!
🎁🎁🎁🎁 Four Aces dealing,
🎁🎁🎁 Three Loons a-sneaking,
🎁🎁 Two Spurs still chasing,
🎁 One Falcon winning spree!

On the 10th day of Christmas, the standings gave to me…

🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Ten Ronin wavering,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Nine Scorpions stinging,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Eight Comets crashing,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Seven Kilts flapping,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Six Icecats home wins,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 FIVE CHINOOK STREEEEAKS!
🎁🎁🎁🎁 Four Aces dealing,
🎁🎁🎁 Three Loons a-sneaking,
🎁🎁 Two Spurs still chasing,
🎁 One Falcon winning spree!

On the 11th day of Christmas, the standings gave to me…

🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Eleven Norsemen raiding,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Ten Ronin wavering,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Nine Scorpions stinging,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Eight Comets crashing,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Seven Kilts flapping,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Six Icecats home wins,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 FIVE CHINOOK STREEEEAKS!
🎁🎁🎁🎁 Four Aces dealing,
🎁🎁🎁 Three Loons a-sneaking,
🎁🎁 Two Spurs still chasing,
🎁 One Falcon winning spree!

On the 12th day of Christmas, the standings gave to me…

🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Twelve Donuts glazing,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Eleven Norsemen raiding,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Ten Ronin wavering,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Nine Scorpions stinging,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Eight Comets crashing,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Seven Kilts flapping,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Six Icecats home wins,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 FIVE CHINOOK STREEEEAKS!
🎁🎁🎁🎁 Four Aces dealing,
🎁🎁🎁 Three Loons a-sneaking,
🎁🎁 Two Spurs still chasing,
🎁 One Falcon winning spree!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

On the 1st day of Christmas, the standings gave to me…

🎁 One Nugget buried deep!
(Val-d’Or digging, still digging…)

On the 2nd day of Christmas, the standings gave to me…

🎁🎁 Two Rush going nowhere,
🎁 One Nugget buried deep!

On the 3rd day of Christmas, the standings gave to me…

🎁🎁🎁 Three Isotopes leaking,
🎁🎁 Two Rush going nowhere,
🎁 One Nugget buried deep!

On the 4th day of Christmas, the standings gave to me…

🎁🎁🎁🎁 Four Crawdads traveling (poorly),
🎁🎁🎁 Three Isotopes leaking,
🎁🎁 Two Rush going nowhere,
🎁 One Nugget buried deep!

On the 5th day of Christmas, the standings gave to me…

🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 FIVE BEAVERS FLOOOODING!
🎁🎁🎁🎁 Four Crawdads traveling (poorly),
🎁🎁🎁 Three Isotopes leaking,
🎁🎁 Two Rush going nowhere,
🎁 One Nugget buried deep!

On the 6th day of Christmas, the standings gave to me…

🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Six Millers milling,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 FIVE BEAVERS FLOOOODING!
🎁🎁🎁🎁 Four Crawdads traveling (poorly),
🎁🎁🎁 Three Isotopes leaking,
🎁🎁 Two Rush going nowhere,
🎁 One Nugget buried deep!

On the 7th day of Christmas, the standings gave to me…

🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Seven Crackerjacks popping,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Six Millers milling,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 FIVE BEAVERS FLOOOODING!
🎁🎁🎁🎁 Four Crawdads traveling (poorly),
🎁🎁🎁 Three Isotopes leaking,
🎁🎁 Two Rush going nowhere,
🎁 One Nugget buried deep!

On the 8th day of Christmas, the standings gave to me…

🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Eight Thunder rumbling (softly),
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Seven Crackerjacks popping,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Six Millers milling,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 FIVE BEAVERS FLOOOODING!
🎁🎁🎁🎁 Four Crawdads traveling (poorly),
🎁🎁🎁 Three Isotopes leaking,
🎁🎁 Two Rush going nowhere,
🎁 One Nugget buried deep!

On the 9th day of Christmas, the standings gave to me…

🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Nine Reign collapsing,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Eight Thunder rumbling (softly),
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Seven Crackerjacks popping,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Six Millers milling,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 FIVE BEAVERS FLOOOODING!
🎁🎁🎁🎁 Four Crawdads traveling (poorly),
🎁🎁🎁 Three Isotopes leaking,
🎁🎁 Two Rush going nowhere,
🎁 One Nugget buried deep!

On the 10th day of Christmas, the standings gave to me…

🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Ten Orrsmen balancing,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Nine Reign collapsing,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Eight Thunder rumbling (softly),
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Seven Crackerjacks popping,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Six Millers milling,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 FIVE BEAVERS FLOOOODING!
🎁🎁🎁🎁 Four Crawdads traveling (poorly),
🎁🎁🎁 Three Isotopes leaking,
🎁🎁 Two Rush going nowhere,
🎁 One Nugget buried deep!

On the 11th day of Christmas, the standings gave to me…

🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Eleven Donuts glazing,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Ten Orrsmen balancing,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Nine Reign collapsing,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Eight Thunder rumbling (softly),
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Seven Crackerjacks popping,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Six Millers milling,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 FIVE BEAVERS FLOOOODING!
🎁🎁🎁🎁 Four Crawdads traveling (poorly),
🎁🎁🎁 Three Isotopes leaking,
🎁🎁 Two Rush going nowhere,
🎁 One Nugget buried deep!

On the 12th day of Christmas, the standings gave to me…

🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Twelve Norsemen leaking,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Eleven Donuts glazing,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Ten Orrsmen balancing,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Nine Reign collapsing,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Eight Thunder rumbling (softly),
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Seven Crackerjacks popping,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Six Millers milling,
🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 FIVE BEAVERS FLOOOODING!
🎁🎁🎁🎁 Four Crawdads traveling (poorly),
🎁🎁🎁 Three Isotopes leaking,
🎁🎁 Two Rush going nowhere,
🎁 One Nugget buried deep!

Oh the Teams You Will Boo!

(A Dr. Seuss–Inspired Christmas Letter to Every GM)

Here's a Dr. Seuss-inspired Christmas letter to every CCHL GM from Santa Claus based on our current standings.

Fort Erie Falcons

Oh Falcons, oh Falcons, you win and you win,
You score and you score and then score once again.
The league looks quite tired, exhausted, depressed—
PLEASE STOP BEING GOOD.
(Signed, Santa. And the rest.)

Denver Spurs

Oh Spurs on your horse with a saddle so tight,
You’re strong and you’re steady and mostly alright.
But glance at Fort Erie and what do I see?
A tiny bit nervous? Just maybe. Just wee.

Capeside Loons

Oh Loons, oh you Loons, you sneak under the radar,
Winning games quietly, neater and smarter.
You say “Are we good?” and I shout “YES YOU ARE!”
Now stop doubting yourselves and go raise the bar.

Las Vegas Aces

Oh Aces, oh Aces, you roll every die,
You win games you shouldn’t and no one knows why.
Your luck is suspicious, your vibes are elite—
I checked the rulebook.
It’s all technically legal. Neat.

Calgary Chinook

The Chinook blows warm, it blows fast, it blows fierce,
It melts through the league like a hockey hot pierce.
Don’t touch it! Don’t tweak it! Don’t “fix” what ain’t broke—
Just ride that hot streak till it runs out of smoke.

Iceland Icecats

At home you’re a tiger, a beast, a delight!
On the road you’re a kitten that lost every fight.
Remember your skates. Remember your plan.
You’re still good at hockey.
Yes. Even in vans.

Fergus Flapping Kilts

Oh Kilts with your flaps and your wins running dry,
You started so strong—what went wrong? Oh my my.
A streak is a streak, it can end if you try,
But first you must stop letting pucks just go by.

Amos Comets

Oh Comets go WHOOSH as they blast through the sky,
Then BOOM they fall down and no one knows why.
I brought you some glue and a seatbelt or two—
Please stop burning up.
We believe in you.

New Mexico Scorpions

The Scorpions scuttle, they strike when you blink,
You don’t see them coming until…
Oh.
You sink.
Keep sneaking and stinging and scaring them all—
The quietest teams are the worst ones to brawl.

Victoria Ronin

A Ronin with honor, with skill and with might,
Who wins on some days and then vanishes—poof—out of sight.
Choose who you are! Be bold! Be precise!
Pick chaos or calm—just roll the same dice.

Halifax Norsemen

Oh Norsemen go raiding with goals galore,
But leave the back door wide, wide open once more.
A shield is quite handy. A defender as well.
Vikings defend.
(Just thought I should tell.)

Wisborg Donuts

Oh Donuts! Oh Donuts! You score with such flair,
But crumbs are everywhere.
Defense? Nowhere.
I love you, I do, but please understand—
Sprinkles don’t cover the whole of the plan.

Parry Sound Orrsmen

Oh Orrsmen, oh Orrsmen, so perfectly plain,
You win some, you lose some, again and again.
Not bad! Not great! Just balanced and true—
The league’s human shrug.
That is… impressive? I guess? You do you.

Seattle Reign

Oh Reign with your crown and your glorious start,
You rule for two periods—then fall apart.
A king must rule late, when the pressure is loud,
Not hand off the throne to the visiting crowd.

Niagara Falls Thunder

There’s thunder! There’s noise! There’s BOOM in the air!
But goals? Not enough.
Please add some right there.
The storm has potential, it rumbles, it roars—
Now strike like you mean it and light up the scores.

Chippawa Crackerjacks

Oh Crackerjacks pop with a bounce and a bang,
Some nights you look brilliant, some nights—just… clang.
Surprises are fun and I love the suspense,
But winning more often would make so much sense.

Georgetown Millers

Oh Millers at home, what happened to you?
You forget how to win in the place you sleep too.
I left you a sign and it says very clear:
“THIS IS YOUR HOUSE.
PLEASE ACT LIKE YOU’RE HERE.”

Senneterre Beavers

The Beavers build dams! That’s what Beavers should do!
Yours broke in November and flooded right through.
Grab logs! Grab sticks! Patch holes with great care—
The goals are escaping.
They’re everywhere. EVERYWHERE.

Chattahoochee Crawdads

Oh Crawdads on roads go splat, splat, SPLAT,
It’s ugly. It’s messy. We can’t sugarcoat that.
Stay home if you must or learn how to roam—
Because holy moly, please win one from home.

Springfield Isotopes

Oh Isotopes glow and they crackle and hiss,
This season’s unstable. It’s something like THIS.
Contain it! Control it! Before it goes BOOM—
I’m writing this letter in a hazmat suit room.

Willowdale Rush

Oh Rush, oh you Rush with your speed and your dash,
You zoom to nowhere and then… gently crash.
Fast is just fast if there’s no end in sight—
Try rushing toward winning. That’d be just right.

Val-d’Or Nuggets

Oh Nuggets, dear Nuggets, I dug and I dug,
But found mostly rocks and one slightly sad lug.
There might be some gold way down deep in the pit—
Bring a bigger shovel.
You’re gonna need it.

Sunday, November 30, 2025

Iceland continues retooling - part 3

Welcome back sports fans. We continue our analysis of the in season moves made by the Icecats, and getting insight into their logic through discussions with GM Saouaf. Over two weeks passed before the Icecats made additional deals. In a pair of moves, the Cats traded and acquired a dman. Leaving is veteran dman Rasmus Ristolainen for prospect Cameron Schmidt and arriving was dman Olli Maatta. Those moves were curious and we asked GM Saouaf about them. “Well, since Savard had cemented a spot in our lineup, Risto was forced to be an injury replacement. Risto wanted to play and we found a place to get him some minutes, sending him to Denver. We still needed a veteran dman to be a substitute, so we acquired Maatta. We were pleased to get Maatta and a talented prospect in Schmidt.”

Would the Icecats now stand still after so many trades, nope. GM Saouaf continued his hard work in building a solid prospect pipeline, sending away two young goalies in Joel Hofer and Colten Ellis and acquiring uber talented Vaclav Nestrasil and also Xavier Bourgault. Nestrasil is off to a great start in the NCAA.

Never one to rest, GM Saouaf once again connected with Fort Erie to trade another long time Icecat, Colton Parayko. Colton was a staple in the top 2 defensive lines for the Icecats. Replacing him would be hard, but the Icecats acquired a solid replacement in Martin Fehervary. Fehervary is a few years younger and provides some salary relief. Iceland also stocked their draft capital with a 2027 1st. The final touch, for now, was a trade with Amos to send Jordan Staal for JG Pageau’s second stint in Iceland and defensive prospect, Jacob Rombach.

It’s been a whirlwind start to the season for the Icecats this season. Time will tell if GM Saouaf is done or will continue to adjust his roster. As always, stay tuned sports fans!

Icecats continue retooling - part 2

Hello again, sports fans. Today, we will continue to look at the roster reshaping of the Iceland Icecats this season. In the last blog, we saw the Icecats ship in a few veterans and ship out some veterans and youth. Let’s continue looking at GM Silvio Saouaf’s in season moves.

After acquiring Jordan Staal, Iceland center Ted Blueger found himself with limited ice time and requested a trade. GM Saouaf found a willing trade partner in New Mexico, shipping the disgruntled center for a 3rd round pick. Through this trade, Erik Haula cemented his role as the 4th line center and 2nd line penalty killer. The roster “seemed” set.

One player that struggled to find consistent offense was Swiss Army knife player, Mark Stone. As such, GM Saouaf facilitated a trade with defending champions, Fort Erie, to give the winger a fresh start. Here is what GM Saouaf had to say. “Mark struggled to find chemistry on the top two lines. We felt it was in his best interest to see if we could find him a better opportunity elsewhere. With Fort Erie looking for a winger, I traded Mark to GM Young for center JG Pageau, a 1st and talented prospect, Cole Reschny. We hated dealing the long time Icecat, but the return was too enticing.”

Unfortunately, Pageau’s time in Iceland was short lived. A week later, GM Saouaf kept on wheeling and dealing, acquiring more futures by dealing Pageau to Amos for Reilly Smith and 2 prospects. Would GM Saouaf continue shaking up the roster or give the team time to gel? Stay tuned, sports fans!

Icecats continue retooling - part 1

Hello again sports fans. Today we review some recent transactions of the Icecats and get some behind the scenes discussions with GM Silvio Saouaf on his logic. In the offseason, Iceland made a significant transition in acquiring veteran center Jordan Staal from Springfield for 3 draft picks. It appeared that GM Saouaf had a plan. Here is what he had to say. “With the additional positions that Aho and Suzuki could play, we saw an opportunity to pair one of them with Connor. As such, we needed someone reliable to be our 3rd line center and anchor our penalty kill. Staal was the perfect solution. Negotiations with Springfield were smooth and we got a deal done quickly.”

Iceland then appeared to once again go all in with the acquisition of defender Rasmus Ristolainen from Chippawa for 2 prospects. It was not clear what role Risto would play as the Icecats signed veteran defender David Savard in the offseason. “Risto was acquired to be a sold depth dman, providing solid defense and veteran leadership, should we need him. Early on, it looked like Savard was struggling so Risto gave us some options.”

Having acquired Staal, GM Saouaf decided to deal veteran and all around great player, Ryan Nugent Hopkins for youth and futures from Amos. It was tough to see Nuge go but the youth coming up provided that flexibility. Young players like Aliaksei Protas, Dylan Holloway, Dimitry Voronkov and Martin Pospisil demanded ice time. In return for Nuge, Iceland also traded young dman Mason Lohrei, given their depth at D. Iceland acquired another solid young and talented winger, Zach Benson, along with 3 picks. Iceland had previously struggled to phase in young and talented wingers and now they seem to have a surplus.

The Icecats roster was not set and we will continue looking at their transformation in the next blog. Stay tuned, sports fans!

Fort Erie First Half of the season team awards!

Welcome to the Fort Erie Falcons HALFWAY AWARDS — the midseason celebration where some players earn glory, others earn shame, and everyone earns content.

No speeches will be cut short. No feelings will be spared.
Let’s dim the lights, raise the curtain, and hand out some deeply questionable hardware.

🏆 THE HALFWAY AWARDS

Presented by FOR Hockey & Poor Decision-Making

🥇 The “I Carried This Team Like It Was a Costco Haul” Award

Winner: Sam Reinhart

54 points in 39 games.
Honestly, if he slows down, so does your entire offensive ecosystem. He is your sun, moon, and reasonably priced power-play merchant.

🥇 The “Scoring on Elite Difficulty” Award

Winner: Jake Walman (FOR)

21.62% TOT SH% / 15.38% FOR SH%
This man is shooting like he found NHL 24 sliders and quietly turned accuracy to 99. Defenseman by position; sniper by lifestyle.

🥇 The “Hit Everything That Moves (And Some Things That Don’t)” Award

Winner: Vincent Trocheck

97 hits and still producing.
Trocheck plays like every opponent owes him money.

🥇 The “Conscientious Objector to Shot Blocking” Award

Winner: Leon Draisaitl

2 shot blocks.
He looked at the bench and said, “You want me to block that? I’m a playmaker, not a mattress.”

🥇 The “Surprisingly Elite Defensive Dad Energy” Award

Winner: Adam Fox

44 blocks with that injury history?
That’s grit, or a medical bill waiting to happen. Either way — respect.

🥇 The “Most Courageous Avoidance of All Physical Contact” Award

Winner: Roope Hintz (FOR)

12 hits in 11 games.
Man is 6’3”, fast as hell, and hits like a tax accountant.

🥇 The “Not Sure He Played But The Spreadsheet Says He Did” Award

Winner: Casey Cizikas

3 GP. 0 points. 8 minutes a night.
He’s like a cameo from a celebrity you vaguely remember.

🥇 The “I Do Everything But Score” Award

Winner: Jaccob Slavin

5.88% shooting, elite defense, endless minutes.
He shoots only to remind his stick it still has a purpose.

🥇 The “Power Play? Never Heard of Her.” Award

Winner: Brandon Hagel

0 PPG, 0 PPA, 0 PPP.
He’s on the top six but treats the power play like a union-mandated break.

🥇 The “Big Man, Small Hitting Energy” Award

Winner: Owen Power

21 hits for a 6’6” defenseman.
He is quite literally too nice.

🥇 The “Did You Even Try to Score?” Award

Winner: Colton Parayko (FOR)

0.00% shooting.
Not low. Zero. He is boycotting goals until further notice.

🥇 The “I Only Play Six Minutes But I Still Matter” Award

Winner: JJ Peterka (FOR)

6.21 minutes per game.
That’s not a shift — that’s an internship.

🥇 The “Still Elite, Just Too Tired to Show It” Award

Winner: Mark Stone (FOR)

10 points in 24 games, 9 giveaways, 39 blocks.
He’s playing like his back is one sneeze away from retirement but he refuses to stop being useful.

🥇 The “Old Man Still Stealing Lunch Money” Award

Winner: Alex Pietrangelo (FOR)

36 takeaways.
He plays like he’s collecting pucks for a charity auction.

🥅 GOALIE AWARDS

🥇 The “Winning Ugly Is Still Winning” Award

Winner: Mackenzie Blackwood

24–4–3 record with a .903.
He is the dictionary definition of “don’t ask how, ask how many.”

🥇 The “Finally Playing Like He’s Not Being Held Hostage” Award

Winner: John Gibson (FOR)

4–0–0, 1 shutout, .910, perfect shootout.
He escaped HFX and immediately remembered how to goalie.

🎤 THE CLOSER: Team MVP (Midseason Edition)

Winner: Sam Reinhart

No drama. No debate.
Just pure, relentless point production.
He IS your franchise right now.

What Every Team Should Be Proud Of — and One Thing They Can Laugh About Too

A hockey season is a wild ride — full of highs, lows, overtime losses that age you ten years, and victories that feel like divine intervention. But no matter where your squad sits in the standings, there’s always something worth celebrating… and always something worth laughing at.

Here’s one real point of pride for every team — and one lighthearted, humorous “win” to keep the vibes positive.

1. Fort Erie Falcons

Proud Of: The most dominant record in the league. A .808 winning percentage is just unfair.
Humorous Win: You’ve scored so much that your goal horn is filing a workplace grievance.

2. Las Vegas Aces

Proud Of: A twelve-game winning streak. Nuclear-level momentum.
Humorous Win: At this point, Vegas casinos are offering a “Bet the Aces, Win Your Mortgage” promo.

3. Fergus Flapping Kilts

Proud Of: A +26 goal differential and elite road play.
Humorous Win: Opponents spend half the game trying not to get distracted by the kilts. Advantage: Fergus.

4. Denver Spurs

Proud Of: Winning tight games with a tiny goal differential.
Humorous Win: No fanbase in the league burns more calories pacing during third periods.

5. Capeside Loons

Proud Of: 158 goals — your offense is pure chaos in the best way.
Humorous Win: The Loons are legally required to buy new nets every month due to overuse.

6. Iceland Icecats

Proud Of: A dominant 14–5–0 record at home.
Humorous Win: Visiting teams spend more time complaining about the cold than defending.

7. Calgary Chinook

Proud Of: A steady offense that shows up every night.
Humorous Win: Chinook games have so many lead changes that fans get vertigo.

8. Amos Comets

Proud Of: An 8–2–0 surge shows your ceiling is high.
Humorous Win: Comets games feature more streaks than a nudist beach.

9. New Mexico Scorpions

Proud Of: One of the most explosive offenses in the league.
Humorous Win: Your games are basically sponsored by defibrillators. Goals = heart attacks.

10. Victoria Ronin

Proud Of: Consistent defensive clutch play.
Humorous Win: Nobody in Victoria remembers what a “normal, low-stress game” feels like.

11. Halifax Norsemen

Proud Of: Staying competitive despite getting outscored overall.
Humorous Win: The Norsemen are single-handedly keeping the league’s supply of moral victories afloat.

12. Wisborg Donuts

Proud Of: A stellar 13–5–1 record at home.
Humorous Win: Opponents are distracted wondering why a team named “Donuts” hits so hard.

13. Parry Sound Orrsmen

Proud Of: A strong late-season push at 7–3–0.
Humorous Win: The team’s new tactic: lull opponents into a false sense of security, then explode.

14. Seattle Reign

Proud Of: A solid recent stretch that’s pulled them back to .500.
Humorous Win: Seattle somehow has the league lead in “almost heart attack” games.

15. Niagara Falls Thunder

Proud Of: A respectable road record for a mid-pack team.
Humorous Win: Thunder games guarantee at least one goal that makes physics walk out.

16. Senneterre Beavers

Proud Of: Better-than-expected road numbers — 10–8–1 is no joke.
Humorous Win: Beavers block more shots than half the league’s goalies.

17. Chippawa Crackerjacks

Proud Of: A promising recent stretch with real improvement.
Humorous Win: You might not win every game, but you definitely win every vibe check.

18. Georgetown Millers

Proud Of: A sneaky offense that still pumps goals despite the record.
Humorous Win: The Millers’ breaks often last longer than their defensive-zone shifts.

19. Chattahoochee Crawdads

Proud Of: A solid .500 home record — fans get a real effort every night.
Humorous Win: Crawdads players lead the league in “Well… that was almost a great play.”

20. Willowdale Rush

Proud Of: Pushing games to OT — this team never dies easily.
Humorous Win: Rush fans have developed elite meditation habits to survive all the tight finishes.

21. Val-d'Or Nuggets

Proud Of: Forces games into extra time with pure stubbornness.
Humorous Win: Nuggets players are experts at keeping things interesting… even when nobody asked them to.

22. Springfield Isotopes

Proud Of: Consistently keeping games from blowing out of control.
Humorous Win: They hold the league record for “most near-comebacks that made the other team sweat.”